Nov 20, 2011
I'm feeling a little overwhelmed.
I had gotten a packing list from a few people over the last week and decided to start picking up a few things on it. When I started out this afternoon I was excited and looking forward to it all. Though, to my surprise I found myself feeling overwhelmed standing in the baby section. I'm not sure if any of you first time mom's out there felt like this or not, but it was so bad for me that I just wanted to run out of there. I was trying to figure out what type of diaper rash cream to get. I know that you might be wondering why diaper rash cream would be overwhelming for someone. I just was standing there looking at all the different types and felt that like what the heck am I doing. I couldn't even figure out what type of diaper cream to purchase....is that weird or what? I stood there feeling so lost. Then I started to panic....I have no idea what a 1 year old wants or needs. Just as I was about to just give up and walk away, a girl asked me what to get a 1 month old. Seriously??? I stood there looking at her with a dumb fast and said I have no idea. As she looked at me with a twisted face, all I could do is walk away with my cart and make a fast track to the check out. Once I got to the car I had a little bit of a melt down. If I can't even pick out diaper rash cream....how am I going to be a good mom.
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14 comments:
Cut yourself some slack, I had two biological kids who are 13 and 11 yrs (which you would think I would have had this under control)but then with our adoption for our daughter who is 2, I felt overwhelmed many times. This process isn't easy at all. You will be a great mom and if it helps I use Zicofax or Penaten. :)
Oh goodness, Kelly. I know exactly what you mean. Our daughter was about 1 when she came home too, and trying to figure out what I was doing in the baby section gave me mild anxiety attacks. I speedwalked out of there as fast as I could before the tears began... several times. There's really not as much chance to "grow into" motherhood when you're starting with a 1-year old... in a hotel room... in an unfamiliar country! It's a unique rite of passage we get to enjoy.
Do you have a friend who you can go with, who is already a mom? That's what I did. She was also a nurse, and had already adopted internationally, so that helped with the baby pharmaceuticals, too. I pushed the cart, and she threw things into it. **It completely saved me.**
You're going to do great. You are. But I know how overwhelming it can be when you're trying to prepare.
You will be a great mom! You will follow your instincts and toddlers don't know that you are nervous.
I had the same thing happen and for me it was the difference between Playtex liners. It just doesn't matter!
The creams Kim mention are both good!
We've had our daughter for 4 years now and we can hardly remember our lives before that. My husband had never fed, diapered or even held a baby before. I was sick and he had to dive right in. If he can parent anyone can!!!!
Linda
Hang in there! If you are worrying about diaper rash cream, you will be a great mom! Feeling overwhelmed is normal. Just remember that God gives us strength for each day and each situation.
Blessings,
Delana
http://nineyearpregnancy.wordpress.com
http://delanasworld.wordpress.com
Kelly, you'll be a great mom! I think we've all had moments like this were it's just so overwhelming we can't process it. With Landon we bought a few different brands of everything and found what we liked after they were used. We really like Pampers diapers compared to Huggies because we found them a lot softer and Landon would get less rash. (maybe that's just us though) you could also buy some "starter packs" they are often in
Walmart or London drugs etc... And come with Johnson and Johnson baby products. Cream, lotion, powder, shampoo etc. Just thought of something else that you might be interested in... Oval in the pharmacy helps with gas. A friend of mine had to use it lots with her son but we rarely used it at all here. You know what... Reagh will be loved, cuddled, kissed and taken care of better than ever and we all make some mistakes with our kids. The most important thing is that he'll be in your arms soon. :)
Hopefully your moments of panic and confusion are few and far between from here on in! If it helps, I didn't bother buying much at all other than a body wash/shampoo, a couple of basic medications (for fever and allergy), and a toothbrush/paste for our kids at first, during transition (ages 1, 2, 3). I bought other things as the need arose and as I thought of them. I am the type to be over-prepared, but there was SO much to pack, set up, and get ready (and we had multiple long distance trips for weekend visits) that I had to let go of some things and just go with the flow. We all survived, and at this point (6 months later), I think I still have some products on hand which have never been opened.
We're all been there - the issue that kept me up at night feeling panicky was preparing and storing bottles of formula. Of course, looking back, it turned out not to be a big deal at all. It will all work out. I recommend going with what Joy said - you really won't know what you want/need until the need arises, so get a few basics (I also loved Dianne's suggestion of taking a friend shopping who has already been there and can help you pick things out) and go with the flow - parenting is a daily learning process and you'll do brilliantly! :)
The exact thing happened to me, standing in Zellers trying to figure out which clothes to buy for our seventh month old. I then proceeded to go to the bottle/ishes section and realized that I didn't even know what a seven month old ate. I ran out of there with nothing and had a total melt down in the car.
It is overwhelming, but you will get through it! You are reaching out there for help and that is important because there are alot of mom's out there that are willing to share their tricks of the trade. Some will work for you and others may not, but you will figure it out! Congratulations on your sweet little boy!
The fact that you ARE stressing over the bum cream ALREADY makes you a good Mom.
This is not easy Kel and kids don't come with manuals. You will do WONDERFUL. Just believe in yourself...and maybe take someone shopping with you for some advice. We all need that!!!!
Best of luck~
Jill
OH yeah, as everyone else has already said, totally normal. Deep breaths. For me it was the medication aisle - who knew there were 18 kinds of cough syrup?? And what the heck is the difference in cough & cold vs cold & cough?? Geez.
It's ok to have some meltdowns at this point, I think it actually reduces the anxiety overall to freak out. :) And frankly, you're probably not going to go too far wrong with any of your purchases. Dianne's idea is great - I bet you know some moms who would love to go shopping with you and help you feel the excitement of getting ready instead of the panic.
One funny story - my aunt travelled with a friend who went to pick up her daughter in China - she didn't want to interfere with the mom/baby bonding but did finally have to step in when she realized mom was trying to put the onesie on upside down. :) So look at it this way, if you can tell arms from legs you are already ahead of moms who have gone before you!!
Oh my, I have so been in your shoes! I too, remember standing in Walmart trying to decide what to buy and having no clue. I cried to my friend and she came on my next shopping trip and helped take charge, suggesting this brand here and that size there.
I realized that this is all knowledge that is passed down by other moms and by learned experience. So grab a mom friend and go and buy. Then try out the different items and you will learn what works best for you and your baby boy!
I so went through this! I would seriously hyperventilate every time I walked into the baby section. Finally I made a list and took my Mom, my mom-in-law and sis-in-law and we went through the list one by one. They helped me with each and every item and were successful!!!
So, grab a family memmber, friend or co-worker....start a list if you want you can send me a facebook message and I will send you mine.
Breathe deeply and exhale! You can do this!
Oh, Kelly, you'll be a great mom! Trying to make the best decision on diaper rash cream already means that you're a great mom - you want what's best for your son right from the get-go. :)
As a mom, I can tell you that we all go through that - whether it's for a newborn or a 1 yr old, or a 5 yr old, and after 7 years, I still sometimes feel like a bad mom, but I know I'm not. And I know you're not. And I know you'll never be a bad mom.
One thing you'll learn as you go is that Reagh will eventually decided FOR you what is best for him. Right down to the diaper cream. You'll buy one brand and it might not work well on him, so you'll try another. If that one works, great. If not, you'll try another. What works for your friend might not work for you. You and your little guy will learn together. :)
Trust yourself. :)
No one knows what they are doing- no matter if you have adopted or had bio kids- that is what I have learned! We got home with Leul and I was still thinking "what do I do with a 2 year old?" You learn as you go and we are all here to help.
Carolyn
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